Hi all!

I see some of the same old names here. Glad everyone is doing okay.

My life is finally good again. It took lots of pain to get to this place though.

Don't know if you remember, but my husband started an affair in December 2002. I tried to hang on to the marriage for about 5 years, but he had moved in with the OW, and we finally divorced.

Turns out the affair ended just 2 weeks after the divorce was final. Then I didn't really here from him too much for 9 months. He started coming around and begging me to take him back, but I was done.

The sad part is that he committed suicide this summer. He took an OD of fiorunal (sp?), and left 4 grown kids, 2 step kids, and my 2 boys.

The OW didn't even come to the funeral. In fact, she hooked up with another married man before my ex died. What a waste.

But life goes on, and I am happy again and our kids are doing well, all considered. Glad to see you all again.

beleiver!!! I'm so happy to hear you are doing well. I even checked out the other site a few months ago looking for recent posts from you, but didn't see any.

It is a tribute to you that your blended family is doing so well after so many ordeals.

I'm happy, finally, as well. Busy busy. Just got my teaching certificate and am a teacher in an elementary school now. And I am halfway through my graduate program for counseling. My oldest graduates in May, the youngest is a junior. Big changes in Spidey's life!!!!

Thanks for checking in.

Spidey - Yes, it has been a long time!

So glad you are doing well. You deserve it.

I'm content with my life and my kids. Surprisingly, they are all doing well. Three are in college, almost graduated, 3 are happily married, and the other two are working. We must have been blessed by God.

I started dating and almost got married. YIKES!!!!!!! But I backed off that and am going to give it more time.

OMG believer!!! So good to hear from you, despite the sad news about your ex.

So glad that you have found your peace.

I can't believe my divorce has now been final for 2.5 years. Of course, it really does sometimes seem longer since we had such a long separation. I too have found a wonderful place of peace in my life.

Thanks so much for checking in and don't be a stranger.

quote:

YIKES!!!!!!!

Wow, that news added to what you already told us would have put me over the threshold.

Good to know that you perhaps saw a pattern, or a big decision you maybe weren't quite ready to make - and stood up for yourself and protected your boundaries. Yay!

Goodness knows we've had lots of practice at doing it the other way! Hahahaha.

Live and learn.

And like Sharon said - Don't Be A Stranger! I have missed your presence and energy.

Hi Believer!

Thanks for the update. Yes, I do remember. I also remember your encouragement to others. Thank you.

I'm glad you & yours are well.

SB

LOL.. I did date after the divorce and met some nice men. And I am old and not gorgeous! Well, except for inside. Anyway, got very close to getting married, but held back. I do believe that the problems I've had with men are not about the men, but about me. So I'm going to take my time and enjoy being by myself.

quote:

I do believe that the problems I've had with men are not about the men, but about me. So I'm going to take my time and enjoy being by myself.

Me too. I have met some nice men. Unlike you, my greatest 'commitment' thus far has been kinda-seeing the same guy for 18 days just a few months after the D. But I was easily scared away from that.

And for me, that is what it still comes down to, me thinks. Scared of getting hurt again. I have finally picked my broken heart up, pasted it all together again, walking down the Path of Life again, and the thought of going back to the broken-pieces-all-over-the-floor stage again is extremely unappealing to me.

However, intellectually I understand that everything changes, life goes on, love will be had again, I will be hurt again, and I am also not the same person I was last time I was in a relationship.

And I'm excited for when it does finally happen again, because it will be interesting to explore that part of myself. When it does happen, it will be a blast I think. Scary and fun and happy and sad. I am excited to see the type of man that finally does wind me up so much that I am willing to take the risk necessary for an intimate relationship.

*sigh* You can see, believer, that I still have not gained the strength of brevity.

At least I'm consistent.

Oh, Spidey, love will come when you are ready for it. Guaranteed. Just takes time. My heart isn't broken anymore, in fact, strangely enough, I can hardly remember the horrible sadness of those days. Or I remember, but don't feel it anymore. The whole thing was so pointless, and it is amazing how lives can be so completely changed by other peoples' decisions.

I mostly went out as just friends, until I met that one man. Came very close to getting married, but he was transferred to Washington, DC and I have commitments here.

Yeah, I know all that intellectually. I miss having a life partner. I miss having someone I tell everything to. I miss having someone I can bounce my ideas off of, my fears off of, etc.

And the Law of Averages says that eventually I will love again. It just seems improbable.

I'm super busy anyway.



Your story gives me hope, though.